sure. wait. what?

August 23

I left the house 9:30am to go to the office, but not without doing a little bit of work first. I promised my co-workers that I would set up the spreadsheets yesterday, which I didn’t get to do it until today. Ah well. 

I hate spreadsheets, man. I’m not bad at spreadsheets; I just think they’re outdated. They’re good for simple tasks, but they’re not sustainable for anything that requires complex calculations. They are also prone to errors, and these errors get easily propagated because people either trust Excel so much they wouldn’t dare audit the formulas, or they are too overwhelmed by the formulas they wouldn’t dare question anything. I hate it.  

Anyways, my friend S sent our group chat a link to National Cinema Day. All movies are worth $4 this Sunday, regardless if it’s regular 2D or fancy 3D or IMAX or whatever. Tickets these days typically cost around $15, so I texted L and asked if he was free. Both K and S will be out of town this weekend, and C already made plans with her fiancee to watch Oppenheimer. I am already seeing my other friends this Friday for Activate, so L is my best bet. He replied. We are watching Strays this weekend. 

August 24

It is 10:00am and I still have not left the house. I chose to attend a morning meeting via Teams. It’s just a check-in meeting with internal folks who are working on this long-running project that is, honestly, one of the most annoying things I have ever had to work on. 

August 25

Yesterday I went to Seafood City right after climbing. I was surprised to see frozen Filipino stuff: frozen buko pandan, frozen dahon ng sili, frozen…I can’t remember anymore. The Seafood City in my city has dope taste in OPM though. They were playing Eheads’ 1995 and some tide edit and Ang Bandang Shirley last night. Good stuff.  

Anyway, another realization: I rarely feel gross about my own body’s filth. I can last days without taking a shower. Even after a physically strenuous day — walking to and from work, climbing for 2 hours — I would simply change to house clothes before going straight to bed; I never worry about soiling my sheets. I grow my toenails long, and I cut them only when walking with socks starts to hurt. I have eczema on the back of my left hand and I mindlessly pick the dry skin in public. I know I’m gross, but I don’t feel grossed out by my own grossness. Ew, eh? 

August 27

L lent me his Nintendo Switch. We played a bit of Mario Kart yesterday, and he also showed me classic games like F-ZERO. Now I get why epilepsy trigger warnings were all the talk back in the day. 

My parents were too poor to afford a gaming console, so I didn’t grow up playing video games. When we finally moved to Canada where gaming consoles didn’t feel like a luxury, I already had hobbies and interests that had nothing to do with gaming. My younger brothers got into gaming though. 

Today I continued playing a different game called Lovers in a Dangerous Spacetime. I suck at it, I keep dying, but it’s fun and cute haha. I stopped playing coz I needed coffee (can’t take a sip and shoot space monsters at the same time) so I went back to watching Only Murders in the Building. 

August 28

It’s a work morning — a Monday! — yet here I am taking my sweet ass time making coffee, scooping trail mix out of the $2 Ikea jar and dousing it in Greek yogurt, refusing to give a single fuck even if it is already 7.30am and my commute to work takes at least — at least! –half an hour. Life is chill. Life is cool. 

Yesterday L and I watched Strays. It was funny and mindless, which are typically not the adjectives I would like to use about a movie I spent money on, but I think I’ve reached the age when funny and mindless are just about what I need. Good enough. 

Two days ago, I went to a bridal shower. I dipped before the bride-to-be started opening the gifts. I didn’t know what a bridal shower was — good thing I googled that same morning and learned that I needed to bring gifts. I drove to a nearby boutique and got the randomest pieces I thought the bride-to-be would like. I ended up giving her a set of two wine glasses, otter wine markers, and an octopus-shaped ice cube tray called Coolamari. The bride-to-be texted me the following day saying she loved the Coolamari. Phew. 

August 29

My former boss is asking for my resume. We saw each other in the bridal shower last Saturday, and she asked if I was interested in working for her again. The job is part-software development, part-engineering. It’s for an oil and gas producer though — which I have luckily avoided so far in my career despite living in a notorious O&G province — but the job is specifically for handling the “environmental” side of the business. I am considering the position, not gonna lie. 

August 30

There was a structural reorganization at work yesterday, and the big bosses presented not only the new org chart but also the goals and targets for the coming years. I still have not decided on how I feel about the changes and the targets. Hmm. It’s just a job, it’s just a job, it’s just a job. 

I meditated last night for 10 minutes. It felt good and calming. For now, I prefer meditating with prompts from some app. I get startled every time the “voice” starts speaking again after a stretch of silence, but the “voice” also pulls me back every time my brain gets distracted. Good stuff. 

August 31

I went to an Indian place for lunch with my co-worker, and just when we were about to walk in, I saw N walking out. I’m not sure if N even saw me. I’m pretty sure, however, that there’s an alternative universe out there in which N and I did not stop talking. I still think about him every now and then.

Featured photo from Pixabay