sure. wait. what?

I WAS meaning to write something long-ish tonight but I ended up logging in to Facebook instead. I’ve been inactive on FB for so long and — holy biscuit I missed a lot! Kasal na si Ganito, engaged na si Ganyan. Tapos may baby na pala si Ano at si Kwan? Shuta, ‘di ko man lang alam.

And then of course I read the news about NDFP consultant Randy Malayao who was shot dead in a passenger bus on Wednesday. The bus pulled over at a designated stop in a town in Nueva Vizcaya when the gunman boarded and shot Ka Randy. It was 2am; Ka Randy was sleeping.

I couldn’t help but worry about my friends back home. They ride buses too — will I be reading obituaries about them next? Hindi naman sila NDFP consultants, pero mahirap na. Sa tindi ng karahasan laban sa mga progresibo, hanga talaga ako sa tapang ng mga taong hindi natatakot lumaban. Sana wala namang mangyaring masama sa mga kaibigan ko. Nami-miss ko na sila; gusto ko silang yakapin nang mahigpit isa-isa.

But because Facebook is Facebook (like any other social media), notes about an activist’s death are squeezed in between memes and travel pictures and other dashing displays of success. I learned that a friend’s sister has finally earned her physician license, another friend has decided to go to law school, and a former org mate has started running a successful (I think) baking business. Weow.

Is this why I prefer Twitter over Facebook? At least on Twitter being a “loser” seems to be the norm. I often read posts about being lost in life and not having one’s shit together and I’m like — yes baks samedt.

But Facebook, I suppose, is what connects me to home better. I see old friends, I hear their stories, and I feel genuinely happy for their success. I also see photos of places that trigger instant nostalgia — an emotion that’s been soothing me in recent days — like Philcoa, Maginhawa, etzeteruh. Nakakamiss din talaga.

Just a bit ago I saw a link to the music video of “Kalachuchi” by Munimuni, and I noticed how strangely familiar the setting was — pucha Area 2! D’yan ako tumira n’ung freshie ako! D’yan ako bumibili ng shake kapag wala akong pera pambili ng totoong pananghalian. Kapag medyo may budget, d’un ako kumakain sa may siomai-an. Tapos ‘yung malapit na football field? Naku, baks, d’yan ako umiiyak. Charot, exaj lang.

Teka, ba’t ko na nga ulit isinulat ‘to? When I started writing this post I only intended to write a short intro to the music video. Welp. I guess here goes the long-ish writing that I was meaning to do.

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Note: I proofread this post a few days after it went live (weow). Ampangit e. There were grammar mistakes and I’m sure there still are. I will try to do better next time na lang, char.

The featured image is a screenshot from the Kalachuchi MV.